Postby josh_manga » Wed Oct 31, 2007 9:44 pm
The ring thing never worked for me, well, it worked some, but i had different... issues.
Anyway, on topic! I think it's cool that you are doing that, our culture is way to desensitized. I think about the people who get all aghast at the thought of saving it, "why??? It's just a kiss!!!!!" and all that jazz. But really, if it's "just" a kiss, why get all bent out of shape, unless it really does mean something... right? ;-)
I am currently engaged, and we have not kissed, but let me qualify that real quick. We kiss from the fingertips up to the shoulders, and we kiss each other's hair that is not touching the head. And really, that's enough stimulation as it is. Heck, we can get enjoyment from kissing each other over the phone! I say all this as an example, how i see it is that society is too cold to such simpler forms of showing affection.
One thing i can tell you, when you do find mister right, make sure he knows of your convictions, and agrees to them himself. It's not enough just to respect someone else's boundaries in a relationship of that depth and emotion, you have to be in agreement. Consider it as early practice toward 'being one' with each other in the flesh. If your physical boundaries are the same, you won't want to hurt each other by breaking them. If you hurt the other, you are hurting yourself.
Keeping each other accountable is a chore, but it's good housework. Also, having other people aware of your boundaries and commitments is good, they will hold you to them as well, but you have to let them hold you to it.
Boy, i could write a book on this... Anyhoo, God's blessings on you and your guy, wherever he may be.
Oh yeah, another way of looking at it is this. Your body belongs to God first, and your spouse second. If you give too much to the guy you are dating, even if you marry him later, you still didn't save it for your husband. You may think, "well, it's my body too" but remember, you and your spouse are one. Your body is his, and his body is yours, together, as one, under God, in marriage. No other way.