"Demons."

[chibiphonebooth]

this is my short story im writing for short stories class. its about a girl who can see other peoples demons. ZOMG! XD

uhhh... yeah. i hope you like. :p im not finished with it yet. ill add more as i write more. XD

Demons

The rain beat hard against the windowpane, droplets rolling down at quick speeds. It was almost a race to see which droplets could get to the end of the window quickest, but before they could reach it- another drop of rain hit them and disrupted their path. It was like a cycle, for it would go on and on, and none of them were able to reach the end before being wiped away.

She watched them with great interest, because as of now, there was nothing else for her to do but sit in her bed. Her pale orange covers were pulled up to her shoulders, and she was tucked in tightly. It was at least midday already, but if one tried to figure out the time of day from looking outside, they wouldn't know. The sky was a slate grey, all the clouds where the same color. She sighed, wanting with all her might to go outside and just stand in the rain. She even wanted more than anything to just get out of this bed, and be able to walk around again. But she couldn't. She wasn't allowed to. And even if she was- she didn't have the strength for it.
The young girl's face did not have the same rosy completion as other young girls, no- but hers was pale and sickly. She had dark circles under her eyes, and her eyelids drooped down heavily. Her lips had too, lost their red shine, and were now almost the same color as her skin- pallor. She closed her eyes for a minute, listening to the beat of the rain. Her hair fell over her pillow in cascades, beautiful golden-red locks that seemed much too brilliant for such a sickly face.
Her listening was interrupted by the sound of footsteps pounding up the creaky stairs. She counted to herself, "3.2.1..."- Her mother opened the door slowly, smiling weakly.

"Hello honey... How are you doing?" She asked in a sugarcoated voice.

The young girl smiled a sad smile.

".I'm... Okay," She replied her voice cracking and wavering.

"Oh sweetie..." Her mother came over to her bed and sat down, delicately caressing her long locks.

"You'll be better...don't worry. The doctor said that it isn't that serious."

It was obvious that she was just trying to cover up the real truth. But the young girl knew, she always knew. From the start- she had always been a sickly child. Catching things the other kids never dreamed of. She got sicknesses that the doctors didn't even know. This one was bad though. She could sense it.

"Mamma. Am I going to...?"

Her mother put her finger on her chapped lips before she could continue.

"Shh... You're fine... don't worry. Now get some rest. I'll bring your medicine up in a little while."

With that, she smiled sweetly again and stood up, heading for the door. She closed it softly and listened for the sheets ruffle. It grew silent in the room, and her mother leaned against the door, sighing. She closed her eyes tightly, and pushed back her long auburn hair, which was now prematurely graying from all the stress of her sick daughter.

The last thing the little girl could remember was the sound of a low voice, her mother's voice panicking, a cold, circular object placed on her shirt, then-

Nothing.

Black.


~*~*~

The sun shone in through the curtains, and little dust particles danced along her bedspread like small fairies. She opened her eyes slowly to the eggshell-white ceiling above her. It was weird. all of a sudden she felt full of strength. She sat up in her bed, confused. She looked around the room frantically, and then called out loudly.
"Moooooommm!!!!"

In no time, she could hear the stomping up the stairs, but the pace was quicker this time. Her mother burst through the door, shocked.

"CLEMINTINE!"

She ran over, tears swelling in her eyes- happy her child had finally woke from a week in deep slumber. The same could not be said for her daughter though, who was in shock. Something had caught her eye- and it grew closer and closer with each step her mother had taken. Her eyes filled with fear, and she screamed Bloody Mary. Her mother leaped back, surprised by the sudden outburst.

"What's wrong, sweetie?" She asked, confused.

There was no reply, but Clementine just pointed at a large, black, Smokey figure that stood behind her mother. Her mother stepped back, which caused the large figure to do the same, making half of it stand in the light from the window, and the other half in the darkness of her room. But the light made the one half of him disappear in the sunlight- while his other half was in full view. Her mother, very confused, looked behind her. Nothing.

"Honey, I don't see anything..."

She turned back towards her daughter, and the dark figure did the same. She stepped closer, and the dark figure's glowing white eyes peered at her.
Another scream escaped her mouth. She put her hands up, covering her face from the nightmare that lay before her. She curled up in her bed, helpless. Her mother placed a hand on her shoulder, and she looked up. The figure stood there, his white, glowing dots for eyes just stared at her. They had no pupil, they were just all white. His figure was loosely shaped; it had no neck, but very broad shoulders. He had no nose or mouth, and long, long arms. Clementine screamed again, and placed her face in her hands, crying.

~*~*~

When she got better, her mother had sent her to so many psychologists, she couldn't count them all. She never got that sick after that day, maybe the occasional cold. She also got a slight case of the chicken pocks, but it was nothing. Psychologists were baffled. No one knew what this young girl was talking about. Dark figures that followed people around? Her mother couldn't even bring her to certain ones. For them, too, had these 'figures' that stood behind them, just staring. No one could explain it. She just learned to shrug it off.

[chibiphonebooth]

She sat at a rusted counter, arms folded. Her soda sat in front of her in a small, cracked glass cup. She had the only soda on the counter; everyone else had mugs filled with coffee. She would have had coffee, if she didn’t hate it with an undying passion. She despised the taste, the look, and especially the smell. She hated everything about it. She sat there, deep in thought, remembering the first time she saw those figures, “those demons,â€

[meboeck]

Wow. This is really good. I kind of wish you had started developing Clementine's character just a little earlier, but I still really like what you did with here character. Now I'm interested to read more.

[chibiphonebooth]

hahahhah. thanks! ^^ im not done.

[starstoryteller]

ooooh this is intusting. Did she gain the gift of seeing the supernatural when she went into a coma?

[starwarsboy90]

Pretty good Chibi!

[chibiphonebooth]

haha thanks guys!

and yeah, she kinda did.

[chibiphonebooth]

o__o continue~ this is interesting! are there any other ppl who can see those demons? did she go through a period where (after she learned to identify the demons) she would just randomly say to some person out of nowhere "Stop stealing." XD what about angels? cuz that'd be horrible to just see all the bad things of ppl, that would make me cynical and sarcastic and possibly depressed. can the demons be destroyed? (yes. probably if they stop whatever bad habit they have.) How long is this gonna be? (It could potentially become a really good long story.) when did she start to recognize the demons? did she ever point out/identify her psychs' demons? (if for no other reason than to creep them out or annoy them or something?)

...ok out of questions. (brain dead) XDD

write more~! ^______^

ahahha im not gunna answer your questions until im done with the story. ;p
so hopefully your questions shall be answered once its finished!

[chibiphonebooth]

its like "oh my gosh" with a z in front. .... yeah i dunno why... >.>

[chibiphonebooth]

moreee!!!

The bell above the door jingled as another customer walked in. Nine instinctively turned to get a look at the new victim for the game they were playing.. Her eyes grew wide with surprise. Slowly but surely, the corners of her mouth rose to show a slight smile, as she turned back around, placing her arms on the counter. She whistled one long note, and rolled her eyes- then let out a slight chuckle. She couldn’t believe her eyes. Delph watched her reaction, and turned back to get a look at this odd spectacle. He smiled too, but for a different reason.
“Man, she’s a good looking one, huh?â€

[Jack Bond]

Wowwwww... your creativity never ceases to amaze me... I don't know any words to describe it but... I'm bookmarking this page... I give it 10 stars out of 5. I'm trying to describe how awesome it is but I can't so... I give up... :p More, more!

[chibiphonebooth]

hahha! ^^

thanks!!!

[Firefly-]

Wow, this is really creative. I am really excited to see what she will do with her powers next. I hope you introduce the main plot soon this is just too much suspense!

[Destroyer2000]

Quite good. I was reluctant to read it at first due to its name, but this is very good.

[chibiphonebooth]

oh thanks! ^^

[chibiphonebooth]

do do do do... more. (if anyone has any critiques, go ahead and say them.)

Delph was now pre-occupied with a dirt stain he had recently spotted on his baggy jeans, and he tried rubbing it off. Nine took this chance to steal a glance at him. His long, brown hair fell into his face as he leaned over. His blue eyes were concentrating hard on the dirt stain that he disliked so much. His glasses caught the reflection of the sun and projected little light spots onto his pants. He had a cute nose, it wasn't too big, nor too small. His lips. She could die. They were perfect and pink, and looked so soft. He was almost perfect. He had a perfect body, slightly thin, nothing was toned except his forarms- but that's the way she liked her guys. He was tall, about 5' 10" or so. As he slouched over, the curve of his back made a perfect C shape. She quickly turned away before he glanced up from his pre-occupation.

"Hey."
Nine turned to him.
"Yeah? What?"
"Um. I dunno how to approach this."
"What?"
He let out a sigh, and scratched the back of his head nervously.
"What is it??"
He let out another sigh.
"Do I have demons?" He finally asked awkwardly.
The sudden question surprised her, and she was taken aback. She blinked.
"Uh..What..?"
"Do I have a demon? Or . demons?" He accentuated the S at the end of demons.
Nine just smiled.
"Well? Do I?"
How could she tell him? It always broke her heart to see demons form around her loved ones, especially Delph. Could she ever admit it? It was to painful to confront. Nine just smiled and looked away.
“Nine…â€

[chibiphonebooth]

She looked at him and smiled, he was obviously upset. He looked down at the ground and studied the patches of dirt on the old floor.
“Hey. Common. Let’s go for a walk.â€

[Firefly-]

This is still really good. I especially like the part where Delph kept on using a bunch of cliche lines. That helped lighten the mood a lot. I can definatley tell that you have shaped Nine's personality out of your own. I can just tell by the way you write the story.

[Jack Bond]

Wow... *loves story* so is this the end?

[chibiphonebooth]

This is still really good. I especially like the part where Delph kept on using a bunch of cliche lines. That helped lighten the mood a lot. I can definatley tell that you have shaped Nine's personality out of your own. I can just tell by the way you write the story.

ahah really? now that i think about it... she kinda is sorta like me... <.<

insteresting. ^^


and yeah, jack, it is the end. i hope you enjoyed it!

[Firefly-]

Wait a minute, it's the end? NO! I hate endings........

[chibiphonebooth]

you know though, just cause i ended it for my short stories class... doesnt mean i hafta end it.

i might actually continue this.

[meboeck]

I really love what you did with the characters! I love how descriptive your writing is.

you know though, just cause i ended it for my short stories class... doesnt mean i hafta end it.

i might actually continue this.

DO IT! You must continue because I said so. This is a really good story and there is still so much you could do with it. *goes off to start a petition thread just because it's the popular thing to do right now* XD

[Esoteric]

It is good. It kept me interested and coming back to read more. I agree that it would be interesting to take the story further, though honestly, you wrapped it up in such a neat little package, I'm not sure whether you'd want to. Very nice short story.

[Firefly-]

you know though, just cause i ended it for my short stories class... doesnt mean i hafta end it.

i might actually continue this.

I would definately read it if you continue it.

[Jack Bond]

you know though, just cause i ended it for my short stories class... doesnt mean i hafta end it.

i might actually continue this.

That would be so totally cool! *Hugs*

[chibiphonebooth]

XD i guess its unanimous... i must continue! \o.o/