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[Swordguy]

This is part of a story i am writing, the main charictor is having a dream sequace.

~Where am I? What is this place? Tiffany thinks as she looks around and down at the rags she is in. “A chain gang?â€

[Photosoph]

That's very cool -I like the story idea. It's an interesting dream sequence -I wonder what the rest of the story is about? I like the message you're bringing through so far as well.
I do have a few suggestions... would you mind if I suggested them?

[Swordguy]

sure go ahead..it is an alagorical story. the main char was once a sevent to the "Great Lord" (lucifer) as those who are refer to him...she actully his second in command, but then is double crossed by another general and left for dead when perseing a "Rebal." She chaces him acrossed a river that divideds the land and the contreys. well the "Rebal" saves her from death and is leading her to Christ. that is the story so far...

[Photosoph]

That sounds good; the allegory, as far as you've told it, sounds like it'll work very well.
One of the things I thought I'd mention would be that if you start a new line each time someone new speaks, it would make it a little easier to read. The other thing is just that there are quite a few spelling errors -if you have Microsoft Word, you could run a spell check; otherwise I could run one for you, if you like. You'll just have to tell me whether you want to use American English (I'm guessing that it's this), or British English (like me! )

As I said before, very cool; I really like the idea for your allegory; I'm sure it'll keep going into a great story.

[Swordguy]

sorry about that i forgot to give the warning of it being unedited, and i am not the best speller if that not aparent. and normally i don't seperate the line os speach while i write becasue it is easyer on me, but i guess i should befoer placing it for others to read, well thanks

[Photosoph]

No problem; yeah, that's okay; I wasn't sure if it was edited or not. ^_^"