TOP SECRET
July 21 2005
Subject: Ken "Locke" Nightow
Agent in charge of prosecution: Chris Kattan
The following has not been altered and those found altering will be prosecuted to the fulleset extent of the law
FBI: Well well, the one known as Locke has been caught.
I knew the MAN was out to get me!
FBI: Oh no, we are on your side Locke. We just want...some information.
Like what?
FBI: Oh just your life's story. We already know youre a 14 year old with ADD with a tendency for irrational thought-
hey that chicken was looking at me funny!
FBI: -and that youve almost died not once, but more times than we can count. It also says here youve been shot at. Care to explain that?
I'd rather not, I've been taken care of by God. Heaven knows how many times his hand has saved me.
FBI: No problem then buddy, we can just find out by..other means.
A few more questions before the valium flavored pizza is here. You spend a masive amount of time on your computer. We've...tracked you across the web. Though you dont look at terrotist sites, you spend numerous hours playing...Counter Strike? A terrorist versus counter-terrorist video game im told. why?
You dont understand. When I play, I dont see terrorists or counter whatever, I see my opponent. And he see's me, and we would do what we have to to win. Its not about nationalitys, it's about getting that headshot from across the map. Its about owning the other team.
FBI: ....
...
FBI: ....
....
FBI: excuse me, "owning"?
Yeah.
FBI: Right. Moving on.
Your not having fun are you?
FBI: Oh what sorry? Jim's showing me this neat thing on the internet!
Then can I take over the interview?
FBI: Uh Yeah sure kid do what you want. Hey Jim play it again!
Jim: Okay! LEROOOOY JENKINS!!
Hey guys, since the feds are busy looking at web videos, I going to tell a bit about my self, I came to CAA when I was 13 and I was a hardcore noob ( just read any post before 04) but now Ive gotten the hang of things.
CAA has impacted my life in so many ways. If I woke up and saw that CAA went away, I dont know what I would do, but I know that I will still have the friends I made ( and met!
). The stuff I like... is everything. Im one of those kids who took the saying "You can be whatever you want to be" too far. One of the few things that make me smile is the beach. Living in California has its perks. The surf is one of them. You havent lived till all thats between you and a giant waves is 2 inches of body/surf board. Music wise...I play anything. From smooth jazz to emo/sreamo, music is more than airwaves. Its life.The weirdest genre on my computer has to be...Brazillian Christian Death Metalcore. I guess thats another perk of living in Cali is the culture. Chinatown is 30 minutes away and Little Tokyo 20.
Gosh thats alot.
The feds are done with their interview so if you guys have any questions Im still tied up here ^^;;
edit: rofl this is my 2,000 post xD
well one version of it 
lol well..in swimming weather anyways.
