Ok this is a story i'm going to try to do. Maybe i'll auctly get it done for once. -_- *starts but never finises stories* After the thing i wrote i don't know how well this will do. *Only got one reply on my other thing* ^_^;;; *dies* Any how it's kinda got the same people from my RP "Age of Light" Just the different Raices like Nidrith's. Any how this is just the first part tell me what you think. I'm still not sure what to call it, so yeah....enjoy my awful story, and terrabul spelling! ^_^;;
“MAN OVERBORD!â€
My story, don't know what to call it.
- SorasOathkeeper
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Thanks, heres some more:
8 YEARS LATER
Spike looked out over the blue ocean in front of her. It was turning out to be a wonderful day, the wind was blowing right. Not a cloud in the sky. Spike closed her eyes as a gust of wind blew in her face. She had finally achieved her goal. She finally got what he wanted; now she could get what she wanted. A smile came to her face thinking of it. This was going to be the day, the day she got what she wanted.
“Tori, Is land in sight yet?â€
8 YEARS LATER
Spike looked out over the blue ocean in front of her. It was turning out to be a wonderful day, the wind was blowing right. Not a cloud in the sky. Spike closed her eyes as a gust of wind blew in her face. She had finally achieved her goal. She finally got what he wanted; now she could get what she wanted. A smile came to her face thinking of it. This was going to be the day, the day she got what she wanted.
“Tori, Is land in sight yet?â€
- SorasOathkeeper
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Don't worry -spelling can be fixed later. There's always time (well usually) to go back and do that. You'd only really have a problem if no one can understand it; but usually if you write it how it sounds people can work it out. The important thing is just to get the story down.
I like this so far; your story is very interesting to read, and I'm already looking forward to the next bit. Also a good opening, though I found it a little confusing.
I shall watch for more chapters!
I like this so far; your story is very interesting to read, and I'm already looking forward to the next bit. Also a good opening, though I found it a little confusing.
I shall watch for more chapters!
(0)>
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[Quote=Photosoph]Well, t'was a good deduction, Mr. Holmes! *salutes Mr. Myoti Sherlock Homes* [/QUOTE]
\(^_^)/
Still in rest and recovery mode. Posting may be sporadic at times.
((_\//
mm
[Quote=Photosoph]Well, t'was a good deduction, Mr. Holmes! *salutes Mr. Myoti Sherlock Homes* [/QUOTE]
Myoti wrote:Elementary, my dear Watsoph. XD
\(^_^)/
Still in rest and recovery mode. Posting may be sporadic at times.
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Photosoph - Posts: 1528
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- SorasOathkeeper
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Heres some more
“WHAT!!! WHAT DO YOU MEAN! I DID WHAT YOU WANTED ME TO! I FOUND OUT THE INFORMATION!!!â€
“WHAT!!! WHAT DO YOU MEAN! I DID WHAT YOU WANTED ME TO! I FOUND OUT THE INFORMATION!!!â€
- SorasOathkeeper
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Yup, I think you explained it ok -in other words he is missing his forearm?
Very cool writing! I enjoyed this part too, though I did notice a few spelling mistakes. Would you mind if I pointed them out?
Very cool writing! I enjoyed this part too, though I did notice a few spelling mistakes. Would you mind if I pointed them out?
(0)>
((_\//
mm
[Quote=Photosoph]Well, t'was a good deduction, Mr. Holmes! *salutes Mr. Myoti Sherlock Homes* [/QUOTE]
\(^_^)/
Still in rest and recovery mode. Posting may be sporadic at times.
((_\//
mm
[Quote=Photosoph]Well, t'was a good deduction, Mr. Holmes! *salutes Mr. Myoti Sherlock Homes* [/QUOTE]
Myoti wrote:Elementary, my dear Watsoph. XD
\(^_^)/
Still in rest and recovery mode. Posting may be sporadic at times.
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Photosoph - Posts: 1528
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- SorasOathkeeper
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I like it! cant wait for more 
[color="SeaGreen"]
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Sakura's Deviantart
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For what do I have
If I don't have You, Jesus?
What in this life
Could mean any more?- Starfield
[/color]
"For I am the LORD, your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you." -Isaiah 41:13
[/color]
[font="Georgia"]
Sakura's Deviantart
[/font]
[color="DeepSkyBlue"]
For what do I have
If I don't have You, Jesus?
What in this life
Could mean any more?- Starfield
[/color]
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Sakura15 - Posts: 2206
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- Location: Somewhere out there! XD
Yeha, here's more.... not much but whatever
Spike and her crew left the tavern, Tori and the others were down the road, then Teressa then Spike and Blade. Spike still was in thought “Spike? Spike can you hear me?â€
Spike and her crew left the tavern, Tori and the others were down the road, then Teressa then Spike and Blade. Spike still was in thought “Spike? Spike can you hear me?â€
- SorasOathkeeper
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Cool! Short but good. I'll see about doing a little bit of editing. I'll just concentrate on spelling and grammar.
[I]Spike and her crew left the tavern, Tori and the others were down the road, then Teressa then Spike and Blade. Spike was still deepin thought
“Spike? Spike can you hear me?â€
[I]Spike and her crew left the tavern, Tori and the others were down the road, then Teressa then Spike and Blade. Spike was still deepin thought
“Spike? Spike can you hear me?â€
(0)>
((_\//
mm
[Quote=Photosoph]Well, t'was a good deduction, Mr. Holmes! *salutes Mr. Myoti Sherlock Homes* [/QUOTE]
\(^_^)/
Still in rest and recovery mode. Posting may be sporadic at times.
((_\//
mm
[Quote=Photosoph]Well, t'was a good deduction, Mr. Holmes! *salutes Mr. Myoti Sherlock Homes* [/QUOTE]
Myoti wrote:Elementary, my dear Watsoph. XD
\(^_^)/
Still in rest and recovery mode. Posting may be sporadic at times.
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Photosoph - Posts: 1528
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GAH! I KNOW HOW TO SPELL CAPTIAN!!! *glairs evily at word* DIE YOU STUPID COMPUTER PROGRAM!!! >_< ANy how, thank you, that helps me a lot!^^
- SorasOathkeeper
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I'm glad I could help.
Do you write in MS Word? Sometimes when typing in that I'll go to spell something, eg... (hmm... must think of an example x_x ...) 'spot', except I'm typing quickly so I'll write 'tsop' instead. Then MS Word will automatically change it -only into something like 'tops' instead of 'spot'. *Shakes head* That auto-word function does help, but can mess up words as well.
Oh, and just to let you know, I'm still liking the story. I'm finding it interesting so far (=good thing, meaning the story interests me and I want to read more. ^_^" ). I also really like the eye color-changing thing.
Do you write in MS Word? Sometimes when typing in that I'll go to spell something, eg... (hmm... must think of an example x_x ...) 'spot', except I'm typing quickly so I'll write 'tsop' instead. Then MS Word will automatically change it -only into something like 'tops' instead of 'spot'. *Shakes head* That auto-word function does help, but can mess up words as well.
Oh, and just to let you know, I'm still liking the story.
I'm finding it interesting so far (=good thing, meaning the story interests me and I want to read more. ^_^" ). I also really like the eye color-changing thing.(0)>
((_\//
mm
[Quote=Photosoph]Well, t'was a good deduction, Mr. Holmes! *salutes Mr. Myoti Sherlock Homes* [/QUOTE]
\(^_^)/
Still in rest and recovery mode. Posting may be sporadic at times.
((_\//
mm
[Quote=Photosoph]Well, t'was a good deduction, Mr. Holmes! *salutes Mr. Myoti Sherlock Homes* [/QUOTE]
Myoti wrote:Elementary, my dear Watsoph. XD
\(^_^)/
Still in rest and recovery mode. Posting may be sporadic at times.
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Photosoph - Posts: 1528
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Yes i use MS word *glairs evily* Oh well, i just haft to be more carful when i type. And thank you i'm glad your enjoying it!^^ and yes...her eye color changy thingy.....thats only the begining...BWAHAHAH!!!
- SorasOathkeeper
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K' I havn't updated this for a while, but I was stuck. But I think I got it. ANy how here is more of my sucky story
"Later Brandon!" Brandon walked out of the back door of the Tavern. "Night John." He called to his friend. He closed and locked the door behind him and shoved his right hand into his jacket pocket. He looked at what he had left of his left arm, then to the stars and sighed. He walked down the dark streets. “Man there was some wired customers today.â€
"Later Brandon!" Brandon walked out of the back door of the Tavern. "Night John." He called to his friend. He closed and locked the door behind him and shoved his right hand into his jacket pocket. He looked at what he had left of his left arm, then to the stars and sighed. He walked down the dark streets. “Man there was some wired customers today.â€
- SorasOathkeeper
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It's not a sucky story, Soras, I think it's really cool, and I'm enjoying it. I don't know if this is the case or not, but sometimes I feel bad about my work, but my work (whatever it is: writing, drawing, music, etc) is actually fine, it's just how I'm feeling that day. That or I just don't have confidence in my work. I don't know if it's like that for you or not, though.
As I said, I'm enjoying your story so far. For me I write because I have all these ideas I want to express -this world I've made up that I think is really cool and want to share with other people. If that's the case for you too, then you shouldn't worry; any other things like spelling etc can always be fixed up later, but as long as you bring out the story idea, it can be a really cool story.
It's great to read more. Thanks for writing!
As I said, I'm enjoying your story so far. For me I write because I have all these ideas I want to express -this world I've made up that I think is really cool and want to share with other people. If that's the case for you too, then you shouldn't worry; any other things like spelling etc can always be fixed up later, but as long as you bring out the story idea, it can be a really cool story.
It's great to read more. Thanks for writing!
(0)>
((_\//
mm
[Quote=Photosoph]Well, t'was a good deduction, Mr. Holmes! *salutes Mr. Myoti Sherlock Homes* [/QUOTE]
\(^_^)/
Still in rest and recovery mode. Posting may be sporadic at times.
((_\//
mm
[Quote=Photosoph]Well, t'was a good deduction, Mr. Holmes! *salutes Mr. Myoti Sherlock Homes* [/QUOTE]
Myoti wrote:Elementary, my dear Watsoph. XD
\(^_^)/
Still in rest and recovery mode. Posting may be sporadic at times.
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Photosoph - Posts: 1528
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- Location: Kiwiland... fighting for mankind in the battle of human vs. sheep.
Thanks, I've just been in a crummy mood latly. Thank you, you are kind^^ Here's s'more
Spike sat at her desk in the caption’s room. She rubbed her forehead and let out a frustrated grunt. She looked up as the door to her room opened, Blade walked in “You know you should knock, what if I was sleeping?â€
Spike sat at her desk in the caption’s room. She rubbed her forehead and let out a frustrated grunt. She looked up as the door to her room opened, Blade walked in “You know you should knock, what if I was sleeping?â€
- SorasOathkeeper
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Cool! S'more! *glows happily*
I just like reading other people's stories because I like seeing what other people's imaginations come up with. Other people can come up with things that I would never have thought of, and I enjoy reading about their characters and places etc.
'The Grey Star.' I like that ship name. Oh, and I think it's spelt 'pier'. I'm not 100% sure, though, so I'd have to check that.
I just like reading other people's stories because I like seeing what other people's imaginations come up with. Other people can come up with things that I would never have thought of, and I enjoy reading about their characters and places etc.
'The Grey Star.' I like that ship name. Oh, and I think it's spelt 'pier'. I'm not 100% sure, though, so I'd have to check that.
(0)>
((_\//
mm
[Quote=Photosoph]Well, t'was a good deduction, Mr. Holmes! *salutes Mr. Myoti Sherlock Homes* [/QUOTE]
\(^_^)/
Still in rest and recovery mode. Posting may be sporadic at times.
((_\//
mm
[Quote=Photosoph]Well, t'was a good deduction, Mr. Holmes! *salutes Mr. Myoti Sherlock Homes* [/QUOTE]
Myoti wrote:Elementary, my dear Watsoph. XD
\(^_^)/
Still in rest and recovery mode. Posting may be sporadic at times.
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Photosoph - Posts: 1528
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- Location: Kiwiland... fighting for mankind in the battle of human vs. sheep.
I honestly like this, Sora! The characters all feel full of personality, much better than I can ever do with that sort of thing! ^^Brandon rushed into town, things were chaotic. Everyone was panicking and running about trying to get out of the way as Cannonballs blasted through buildings. Brandon looked up as a cannonball swooped over his head and crashed into a building behind him. He watched as pieces of the roof and building crashed on the ground. He turned and headed to the tavern, taking a quick glace to the sea as the attacking ship let down small boats filled with the crew. “Pirates!â€
- SorasOathkeeper
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Cool! That's such an excellent weapon too. 
I would love to have me one of those. The fact that it has a blade on the end of a chain is cool enough, but having that expand is a really excellent original idea.
I would love to have me one of those. The fact that it has a blade on the end of a chain is cool enough, but having that expand is a really excellent original idea.(0)>
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mm
[Quote=Photosoph]Well, t'was a good deduction, Mr. Holmes! *salutes Mr. Myoti Sherlock Homes* [/QUOTE]
\(^_^)/
Still in rest and recovery mode. Posting may be sporadic at times.
((_\//
mm
[Quote=Photosoph]Well, t'was a good deduction, Mr. Holmes! *salutes Mr. Myoti Sherlock Homes* [/QUOTE]
Myoti wrote:Elementary, my dear Watsoph. XD
\(^_^)/
Still in rest and recovery mode. Posting may be sporadic at times.
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Photosoph - Posts: 1528
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- Location: Kiwiland... fighting for mankind in the battle of human vs. sheep.
That weapon rocks!
Thank you. Yeah theres going to be some odd weapons in this.
Brandon ran into the Tavern and looked around “JOHN! JOHN WHERE ARE YOU!â€
Brandon ran into the Tavern and looked around “JOHN! JOHN WHERE ARE YOU!â€
- SorasOathkeeper
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yay! sora's got a story going that i can actually focus on!!! *looks around* ... did i just say that out loud? oh... well, there's several pages i need to get started on, but i think i'll put off what i can do today for tomorrow. no worries. i'll be back!
oh, i did read the first several sections. VERY nice. i can't wait to read more. *malicious look on face* hehehe
oh, i did read the first several sections. VERY nice. i can't wait to read more. *malicious look on face* hehehe
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
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LostChild - Posts: 528
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- Location: where i sleep.
Sorry I didn't reply earlier! This is cool! Poor John. T_T
Whoot! I like odd weapons -they add interest and originality. ^_^
Whoot! I like odd weapons -they add interest and originality. ^_^
(0)>
((_\//
mm
[Quote=Photosoph]Well, t'was a good deduction, Mr. Holmes! *salutes Mr. Myoti Sherlock Homes* [/QUOTE]
\(^_^)/
Still in rest and recovery mode. Posting may be sporadic at times.
((_\//
mm
[Quote=Photosoph]Well, t'was a good deduction, Mr. Holmes! *salutes Mr. Myoti Sherlock Homes* [/QUOTE]
Myoti wrote:Elementary, my dear Watsoph. XD
\(^_^)/
Still in rest and recovery mode. Posting may be sporadic at times.
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Photosoph - Posts: 1528
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Wow....he only had like three speeking parts and you sad...? lol. Heres more.
Spike looked to the town “BLADE! Darn him! He’s probably out fighting instead of getting the others! DARN HIM!!!â€
Spike looked to the town “BLADE! Darn him! He’s probably out fighting instead of getting the others! DARN HIM!!!â€
- SorasOathkeeper
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Lol -"AND MASSES THAT EXPAND AREN'T CHEATING!!!" << 
\(^_^)/ *hugs you* Thank you for more writing!
\(^_^)/ *hugs you* Thank you for more writing!
(0)>
((_\//
mm
[Quote=Photosoph]Well, t'was a good deduction, Mr. Holmes! *salutes Mr. Myoti Sherlock Homes* [/QUOTE]
\(^_^)/
Still in rest and recovery mode. Posting may be sporadic at times.
((_\//
mm
[Quote=Photosoph]Well, t'was a good deduction, Mr. Holmes! *salutes Mr. Myoti Sherlock Homes* [/QUOTE]
Myoti wrote:Elementary, my dear Watsoph. XD
\(^_^)/
Still in rest and recovery mode. Posting may be sporadic at times.
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Photosoph - Posts: 1528
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Lol, yeah your welcome...^^ Kk heres more.
Chapter 2
Brandon tried to keep up but Blade was too fast for him. The only way Brandon was able to follow him was because Blade had to stop every so often to fight off the attacking Pirates. He finally came to a stop and noticed Brandon “You’re still following me?â€
Chapter 2
Brandon tried to keep up but Blade was too fast for him. The only way Brandon was able to follow him was because Blade had to stop every so often to fight off the attacking Pirates. He finally came to a stop and noticed Brandon “You’re still following me?â€
- SorasOathkeeper
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