i cant watch

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i cant watch

Postby sonichiro » Sat Mar 05, 2005 8:27 pm

this is a song i wrote about how i was feeling when my mom was in the hospital.

This isn't the place nor the time,
If you leave me now my life will die,
I never thought it would end like this,
I wont let you leave me now,
I still need you here.

Will you be there to watch me grow up,
Will you be there on my wedding day,
Who will hold my hand,
Who will dry my tears,
I still need you here.
Is it that selfish to keep you here in agony,
Your suffering tortured my spirit,
Your pain broke my heart,
I cracked in two over you and i cant watch it any more.

Will the time just pass,
Will you slowly fade,
Are you going to leave me here,
Am i going to be alone,
I still need you here.

Will you be there to watch me grow up,
Will you be there on my wedding day,
Who will hold my hand,
Who will dry my tears,
I still need you here.
Is it that selfish to keep you here in agony,
Your suffering tortured my spirit,
Your pain broke my heart,
I cracked in two over you an i cant watch it any more.
-- if white was black and black was white, what of shades of grey?
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Postby Esoteric » Sun Mar 06, 2005 11:37 am

Touching and insightful. It made me ponder....
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Postby Magekind » Tue Mar 08, 2005 2:37 pm

As Esoteric has stated. It's actually pretty good.
Take it like you gave it; what else matters in the end? To be honest, it's all a one-shot test; that leaves plenty of places to go wrong, but how will you ever know? There's a pointer, I will admit. Turn it on, listen to it, feel it burn.

At-Close Paren-Right inclusive bracket-Tilde. Thanks to CAA mods. Taken from Jaden Mental's sig.
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Postby dragon's bane » Tue May 03, 2005 7:12 pm

*tear* how sad.....
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Postby Photosoph » Wed May 04, 2005 1:17 pm

It's a beautiful, touching poem. Excellent writing.

I know I don't understand all of it; but my Mum has been sick for years, unable to get out of bed a lot, so I really feel for you. I hope you'll be okay; if there's anyway I can help, feel free to PM me.
(0)>
((_\//
mm

[Quote=Photosoph]Well, t'was a good deduction, Mr. Holmes! *salutes Mr. Myoti Sherlock Homes* [/QUOTE]
Myoti wrote:Elementary, my dear Watsoph. XD

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Still in rest and recovery mode. Posting may be sporadic at times. :pinned:
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Postby SorasOathkeeper » Wed May 04, 2005 1:56 pm

Very good.
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Postby livewire » Thu May 05, 2005 8:48 am

As before stated, the poem is very touching...
I liked it...
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Postby sonichiro » Sat May 07, 2005 6:50 pm

thankyou. i wrote this soooooo long ago and i havent been in the writing forum in a while. i was surprised to see all the comments! thanks all. im ok now. i was dealing with some pretty brutal stuff for a while but its all good now and my mums okay now.
-- if white was black and black was white, what of shades of grey?
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Postby Mr. SmartyPants » Tue Jul 26, 2005 11:52 pm

i started tearing when reading that to be honest

however, how is your mother doing as of this moment?
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Postby Photosoph » Wed Jul 27, 2005 4:54 pm

thankyou. i wrote this soooooo long ago and i havent been in the writing forum in a while. i was surprised to see all the comments! thanks all. im ok now. i was dealing with some pretty brutal stuff for a while but its all good now and my mums okay now.

I'm glad she's okay. ^_^ It is a really good poem as well -I'm sure it would go really well as the words for a song, especially with the repitition of the second verse.
(0)>
((_\//
mm

[Quote=Photosoph]Well, t'was a good deduction, Mr. Holmes! *salutes Mr. Myoti Sherlock Homes* [/QUOTE]
Myoti wrote:Elementary, my dear Watsoph. XD

\(^_^)/
Still in rest and recovery mode. Posting may be sporadic at times. :pinned:
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