Corrupted wish game

[Kaligraphic]

Granted, but now we hate them for becoming mainstream.

I wish that Of Nations and States was also the setting for numerous anime series about our exploits.

[Blitzkrieg1701]

Granted, but the anime writers change a lot of character and story details, stick in lots of gratuitous fan-service, and resort to LOTS of filler episodes.

I wish the things I just mentioned weren't as common as they are.

[Yuki-Anne]

Granted. Anime is impossibly rare.

I wish I didn't ruin clothes at such a prodigious speed.

[rocklobster]

Granted, but it's irrelevant now because everyone goes around naked.
I wish facebook chat had voices.

[Yuki-Anne]

Granted. And you know what? It's super freaking annoying, because it's facebook chat, and people you don't want to talk to keep bugging you, and then when you are talking to people you want to talk to, chat goes on the fritz and repeats one thing you say over and over and over and then kicks you off.

I wish everybody was wearing clothes again.

[rocklobster]

Granted, but they're tacky tie-dye shirts and jeans.
I wish I had a robot dog that shoots lasers and talks.

[Gala]

granted but the dog only tells knock knock jokes and his favorite game is to play laser tag with the neighborhood cats.

I wish that there really was gold at the end of rainbows.

[ST. Attidude]

Granted but its underground. Grab your pick and start digging.

I wish that I had shoes that would literally make me run faster and jump higher.

[Kaligraphic]

Granted. Your shoes now cause murderous monsters to jump out of nowhere and chase you, trying to kill and eat you. I don't know about Air Jordans, but it's fear that'll give ST.Attitude wings.

I wish for a golden ticket.

[Midori]

Granted but when you get into the factory you overdose on pixie stix and turn into fine, sweet, sentient powder.

I wish for three more wishes.

[Gala]

granted but each wish will be granted to a random british person

I wish that I could play the harp

[Yuki-Anne]

Granted. But you're really bad at it.

I wish I could touch the sky.

[Gala]

you gain the ability then while flying to touch the sky you get eaten by mutant meat eating moth

I wish I could have a pet kangaroo.

[Lil_Ninja]

Granted. You move to Australia, and take a kangaroo in as your own.
But during the first week of your ownership of this kangaroo, due to the nature of kangaroos, it kicks you half to death, and then PETA comes in, and you get arrested for owning a wild animal without a license. So sad for you :[

I wish I was a really good football player.

[Blitzkrieg1701]

Granted, but Baseball just came back in a big way, so there's no one to play with.

I wish flying chipmunks were part of the US Air Force.

[Yuki-Anne]

Granted. But they're highly ineffectual, and usually end up a splatter on the windshield of an enemy fighter. Poor chipmunks. WHY? WHYYYYYY???

I wish I could be genki today.

[QtheQreater]

Granted. You are now a bowl of Genki Ramen.

I wish for fish inside a dish.

[Blacklight]

Granted, said fish is now embedded in the dishes you eat off of, and they stink pretty bad.

I wish for a dish inside a fish.

[bkilbour]

Granted. A fish eats your dinner and swims away.

I wish Layne Staley would come back to life.

[rocklobster]

Granted. Enjoy being chased by a Layne Staley zombie.
I wish DC Comics would get rid of Superman-Prime. I don't want such an immature brat representing me.

[Yuki-Anne]

Granted. The entirety of the Superman comic and the world created therein have just evaporated.

I wish there was some flying superhero to comfort emo kids.

[Peanut]

Granted, but he's still not Superman so its not the same.

I wish I had more Ice Cream...

[QtheQreater]

Granted. An entire truckload of tuna-flavored ice cream is on its way.

I wish pumpkins were growing in the front yard.

[Peanut]

Granted, giant, mutant, killer Pumpkins are growing in your front yard and your going to be their first meal.

I wish our future Pumpkin overlords would be more merciful and not eat everyone they see.

[Yuki-Anne]

Granted. But since they have no eyes with which to see, it doesn't much matter... :/

I wish I had some lunch.

[rocklobster]

Granted, but it's head cheese. That stuff is disgusting!
I wish I had a working Atari 2600.

[Peanut]

Granted, but it costs you your last working TV.

I wish I didn't have a class before 10 AM today.

[Blitzkrieg1701]

Granted, but the class doesn't get OUT until 7 PM... with no bathroom breaks.

I wish the Yeti I have locked in my basement would quit tossing his empty pudding cups into the yard.

[Kaligraphic]

Granted. By now he needs to use the bathroom quite badly. As he does not wish to stink up the basement, this leads to him throwing horrifically full pudding cups into your yard.

I wish that Yetis could wish.

[Blitzkrieg1701]

Granted, but the wishes are always bathroom related. ALWAYS.

I wish this thread's sudden turn towards bathroom-related humor would end immediately.