Corrupted wish game

[sailorsaturn]

Granted. You now get to sleep in a pile of twigs.

I wish spinage man you stronger REALLY fast like it does in Popeye.

[Kaligraphic]

Granted, Spinage Man very rapidly becomes absurdly strong, making him the strongest superhero armed only with the power of spinning. He gives up the superhero business, and turns to the stage, developing a dance/strongman act that captivates the world. Unfortunately, the pressure of celebrity is too much for him, and soon he turns to alcohol, and, when that fails him, drugs. Harder drugs, looser women, and more riotous living come fast, as he tries to salve the pain of his disintegrating life. Eventually, he falls into a deep depression, and, finally, in the depths of despair one night, he takes his own life.

I wish that I had gone for the light-hearted corruption instead.

[FllMtl Novelist]

Granted, Spinage Man very rapidly becomes absurdly strong, making him the strongest superhero armed only with the power of spinning. He gives up the superhero business, and turns to the stage, developing a dance/strongman act that captivates the world. Unfortunately, the pressure of celebrity is too much for him, and soon he turns to alcohol, and, when that fails him, drugs. Harder drugs, looser women, and more riotous living come fast, as he tries to salve the pain of his disintegrating life. Eventually, he falls into a deep depression, and, finally, in the depths of despair one night, he takes his own life.

XDDDDDD

As for your wish, granted. But it didn't make anybody (including me) lol, so you fail and must live your life in embarrassment and shame. How could you think for even a second that was funny?

I wish I was at the beach.

[Nate]

Granted. However, the beach is closed due to an abnormally high concentration of jellyfish washing up on shore, making it too dangerous for anyone to go near it.

I wish I could get paid to sit around my house and only do what I wanted to do.

[sailorsaturn]

Granted. But your life gets very boring and lonely, you eventually loose your mind and your life begins to very much resemble the comic strip Garfield minus Garfield.
http://garfieldminusgarfield.net/

I wish I could learn everything a book had to offer simply by staring at the cover for a few seconds.

[FllMtl Novelist]

Granted. But then you get zapped by aliens. (It's a duex ech machina!!)

I wish sunscreen wasn't so greasy.

[sailorsaturn]

Granted. It now burns like acid.

I wish I could dye my hair as much as I like without damaging it.

[Kaligraphic]

Granted, but you completely dissolve your scalp.

I wish for a sports car.

[KougaHane]

Granted, but it turns into a waffle and flies to the ends of the earth, where it is blasted into oblivion.

I wish no one will grant my wish.

[Kaligraphic]

Granted, nobody ever does anything you want ever again. That includes granting that very wish, in a very quantum physics sort of way, and I can explain this to you with <insert 120 pages of dense, incomprehensible math here>. As a result, you are now trapped in a pocket reality tucked away in an obscure corner of an equation, and your brain is assaulted with math non-stop for the rest of eternity.

I wish for a fancy wristwatch.

[KougaHane]

Granted, but the second hand spins way too fast and propels the watch away like a helicopter.

I wish I wasn't trapped in a pocket reality tucked away in an obscure corner of an equation, my brain being assaulted with math non-stop for the rest of eternity.

[OfficerSting]

Granted. Now you're trapped in the core of a blue star.

I wish for great justice.

[rocklobster]

Granted. Now you're out of a job because police are no longer needed.
I wish for our president to be impeached.

[ST. Attidude]

Granted, but now the government has no "change for a hope."

I wish that this fish would stop pinching me.

[OfficerSting]

Granted. Now they just eat you.

I wish for more wishes.

[Nate]

Granted, but you lose your voice and limbs and so are unable to use them.

I wish people would stop bringing politics unnecessarily into fun threads like this one.

[Blitzkrieg1701]

Granted. Now they bring lengthy discussions about quantum physics.

I wish one of the fishing boats from Deadliest Catch would catch Godzilla.

[Nate]

Granted, but it's the lame American Godzilla. Also as they pull it up someone says "That's a lot of fish."

I wish I could sleep comfortably at night and feel well-rested when I awoke.

[Blitzkrieg1701]

Granted, you wake, thoroughly-rested, after sleeping soundly for 50 years.

I wish I could use an electric guitar to level whole buildings with the power of RAWK!

[Tamachan319]

Granted! You level whole buildings-including the one you're currently inside.


I wish I still had a cat.

[airichan623]

Granted. But now you have a flesh-eating zombie cat who wants to eat you.

I wish I had the liner note thingies for my azumanga daioh...

[Blitzkrieg1701]

GRanted, though the text for this one is entirely in Portuguese.

I wish I was eating at Taco Bell right now.

[Ante Bellum]

Granted, but you also happen to be in the world of Demolition Man.

Ante wishes for better book binding skills.

[PonderingChibi]

Granted, but now you can't stop book binding.

I wish for more wishes.

[Kaligraphic]

Granted, you are presented with other people's wishes, which you must grant. That's how the game works.

I wish for the most insanely awesome wish corruption ever.

[PonderingChibi]

granted, but sadly, you don't get to know what it is.

I wish for a bunch of rootbeer.

[OfficerSting]

Granted. Sadly, each bottle is forty feet high and twenty feet wide, making it impossible to store or drink.

I wish for sparkling water.

[Ante Bellum]

Granted, but when you drink it you turn into a Meyerpire.

I wish our kitty was more playful.

[FllMtl Novelist]

Granted. Now all she wants to do is play, play, play. You never get any sleep now.

I wish I knew what I'll be doing tomorrow.

[PonderingChibi]

granted, but all it is is a very sad, miserable thing that's to horrible to say.

I wish I could watch more of the anime series that already ended.