Melchizedek

[Gelka]

I noticed you didn't post on who's who. Not that you have to I'm just saying you may get even more views if you let everyone know who you are. ^^

[XPManga]

What do you mean?

[Gelka]

On the Forum there's this place called who's who where you can start a new thread and just let everyone know who you are. You can even let them know that you've posted your series. I'm very certain that you may get more views.

[XPManga]

Ok. So i have been wanting to know how ppl like/dislike this manga. So, I'm gonna ask you guys to rate the following:

Character Style - Such as eye design, charater design, hair design. Rate on a scale from 1-5.

Story - The story thus far. Rate on a scale from 1-5

Manga Style - Such as panels, organization, and screentone (even though I don't use a lot of it). Rate it from 1-5

Dialogue - Conversations between characters. Rate on a scale from 1-5

Characters - Such as Melchizedek, Evangeline, Paul, Caela, and Gen. Gabri-El. Rate EACH character from 1-5

And begin!

[Gelka]

Character Style: well I give it a 3 and 1/2 It's honestly not the most appealing style in my opinion. ( You should give new styles a try you may find another style you may prefer )

Story:4 ( I like the plot it's just I'm not so used to stories that are so straight forward.)

Manga Style: 3 ( I bet you could do a bit better with them)

Dialogue: 4

Character: 5 ( so far so good!)

^_______________________________________________^

[XPManga]

I have been trying to make my own style, just so I won't be accused of plagarism.

[Gelka]

Lolz. You can practice other styles I don''t think it's plagarism (sp?).
I do it all the time. You might find another one that's easier for you to
draw and more appealing to your viewers.

[XPManga]

well, the first style i practiced with was Akira Toriyama's style (DBZ). Then it developed into my own stlye.

[Gelka]

Or you could just stick with your own style, I just suggest trying to go into a bit more detail. It'll make your characters way more fun to look at. I'm looking forward to the next chapters. ^_______^

[XPManga]

oh btw, I'm rewriting all the dialogue (all the pages). Now this doesn't mean re-drawing the pages, just the words. I realized that manga dialogue must be (1) in Anime Ace font and (2) all capsed. But I'm also working on more new pages.

[Gelka]

Yay. Can't wait to see them. ^____^

[XPManga]

Ok guys! I have redone the the bubbles. Some of the dialogue have been changed as well but not too much.

Also, i never realized that Guests of Smackjeeves could not rate the manga, so i changed the preference so you guys can rate it. Just so you know.

[Gelka]

^^ nice.

[XPManga]

Hey! I have decided to SLOWLY remaster Chapters 1-3 (including Ch. 4 if necessary). I'm still going to give Chapter updates as well.

Also, I'm having some technical difficulties with Smackjeeves. It used to take my 500 pixel pages, but when i tried to overwrite the pages, it said the pages had to be under 0 kb and that's a really small page, so yeah, ur gonna have to wait for that.

[XPManga]

Chapter 5 now posted!!!

Chapter 6 will be coming soon!!!

[Gelka]

Your getting better at detail.^^ I like how you colored him in on the first page.

[XPManga]

Yay! I'm getting better!

[mechana2015]

Character Style - Eye design-4
Character design-3
Hair design-2, 1 for Mel

Story - 2, borderline 1 based on your stated goals.

Manga Style - Panels- 3
Organization-1
Screentone-1

Dialogue - 2

Characters - Melchizedek-3
Evangeline- 2
Paul-3
Caela- 3
Gen. Gabri-El.- 3

[XPManga]

So far as the ratings goes, the averages are 3.9/5 (by Gelka) and 2.28/5 (by mechana). So, one person really liked it, while the other didn't like it so much. well, everyone has their own taste of story. but both sides did like the character design, so that counts for something.

[mechana2015]

Unfortunately, I had to actually force myself to keep reading through several very serious sticking points in the plot to see the art. Just something to keep in mind.

And that black arc in Mel's hair... is that plot important, because it really bugs me if it isn't.

[XPManga]

Yeah, with that arch thing in Mel's hair, since I'm remastering the pages, I was actually planning to remove the the arch, but I haven't gotten to the parts of remastering Mel yet.

And the story is supposed to be serious. It's supposed to be like "Death Note-serious".

[mechana2015]

Yeah, with that arch thing in Mel's hair, since I'm remastering the pages, I was actually planning to remove the the arch, but I haven't gotten to the parts of remastering Mel yet.

And the story is supposed to be serious. It's supposed to be like "Death Note-serious".

Serious isn't the problem I have. The problem that I have is that the first few chapters seem oversimplified and rushed, as if you're trying to get a lot out of the way, at expense of making characters realistic, interesting, or even likable in some cases. UC covered a lot of my other issues with what I've read so far, so if you want to see a lot of other story issues I had, reread his post.

[Gelka]

You do tens to rush the story. Personally I do prefer one that's not so rushed.
I might have preferred Evangeline confessing her love to Melchizedek but, he not
feeling the same way at the time. But, during separation does develop feelings for her.
But, that's just a thought. ^^

[XPManga]

ATTENTION: The manga has been deleted due to the fact that the story is not as good as I wanted it to be. So, I'm going to take the time to redo the story and not make it until I think it's absolutely simple and perfect.

[Gelka]

I'm looking forward to the new version. ^^