Corrupted wish game

[Blitzkrieg1701]

Granted. Sure, it's a clay sculpture of a sandwich, but you never said anything about it being edible.

I wish Goldfish were rocket powered.

[rocklobster]

Granted, but now they're impossible to catch.
I wish g4 was off the air.

[Sakura15]

Granted, but now it's in the water

I wish junk food didn't make you fat

[wingedfox]

Granted but now it makes you disturbingly thin.

I wish I didn't have to retake math.

[Kaligraphic]

Granted, now you have to retake quantum physics.

I wish for a plastic wombat.

[Blitzkrieg1701]

Granted. A plastic wombat exists... somewhere, at some time.

I wish yawning gave people super powers

[mitsuki lover]

Granted you now have Bouncy Boy's powers!

I wish that Batman and Catwoman would tie the knot finally.

[Kaligraphic]

Granted. They've tied you up with rope and are going to torture you before dumping you in the sewers.

I wish that Gordon Freeman would run for President.

[mathgrant]

Granted! George W. Bush asks Gordon Freeman to run into the ocean. He obliges and drowns.

I wish I lived in Canada.

[rurouninaruto]

Granted. u now live in canada..... in a card board box

i wish i could be dictator of the world!

[USSRGirl]

Granted, but now I have to nuke you out of jealousy.

I wish Kaligraphic would spontaneously combust.

[mitsuki lover]

Granted but it happens on your mom's new Persian Carpet and she is so P.U.ed at you that you have to take an assume name and enter the witness protection program and go live in Hoboken,New Jersey.

I wish that Lex Luthor would buy out Tony Soprano.

[Blitzkrieg1701]

Granted, but but the screen goes black before we find out what happens afterwards.

I wish Mystery Science Theater 3000 was the national TV show of America

[mitsuki lover]

Granted it is now the national tv show of the northern part of the U.S.
the southern part is stuck with Barney though.

I wish that they would admit that Captain Archer on Enterprise is really
Dr.Sam Beckett from Quantum Leap inside Captain Archer's body.

[Kaligraphic]

Granted. But the admission tears the crew of the Enterprise apart, and they turn on each other, Battle Royale-style. Then they wise up and come for you.

I wish that Tennessee Ernie Ford would be the next big thing musically for the 14-17 demographic.

[Blitzkrieg1701]

Granted. But he's only the next big thins for about 12 minutes, then he's painfully lame and outdated. You know how the kids are these days.

I wish Paul McCartney could fly

[mitsuki lover]

Granted Paul McCartney now has real wings,unfortunately that gives him the idea to go on a Wings reunion tour.

I wish that McCartney had never formed Wings.

[mathgrant]

Granted, now Dolly Parton did.

I wish Meaty-O's was a real cereal, and tasted good.

[Alexander]

Granted, but the cereal looks like Jack Thompson.

I wish I could have $2 dollars.

[mitsuki lover]

Granted you now have $2 in Confederate dollars.

I wish that people would stop making references to Washington State
University Quarterbacks nicknamed The Throwin' Samoan.

[Htom Sirveaux]

Granted, he's now nicknamed Agnes.

I wish I could have a wish with no goofy consequences.

[mitsuki lover]

Granted you now have a coupon for one free non-goofy response wish,but the catch is you have to use it in Akron,Ohio before Jan.31,2008.

I wish that cricket eating was the next Olympic sport.

[Blitzkrieg1701]

Granted, but the sport is disgraced by repeated scandals over the crickets using steroids.

I wish I had a low paying, unfulfilling job at a run down gas station with lousy hours and no benefits.

[Kaligraphic]

Granted, but the gas station is on top of a cold, rocky mountain, and your job is to, wearing nothing but a ragged old sheet for a year, recite every post in the Corrupted Wish Game from memory. And everyone else's job is to interrupt you and make you lose your place and have to start over. The job is entirely devoid of pay and benefits, and you will be banned from the site if you get a post wrong.

I wish that the next McDonalds ad campaign would feature Ronald as a sumo wrestler.

[Blitzkrieg1701]

Granted. Now we have to sit though years of lame comedians using the commercial as a punch line for jokes about how unhealthy McDonald's food is.

I wish I had a cameo in an episode of Heroes

[mitsuki lover]

Granted you are the dead guy lying at Mohindar's apartment doorway when he comes home.

I wish that Socks Clinton would run for President.

[Kaligraphic]

Granted, but he wins. You would not believe the depth of political thought that goes on in the mind of a cat. Unfortunately, this cat just wants to nuke Ohio. Bye-bye, Ohio.

I wish that I could get inexpensive Japanese curry at any hour of the day or night.

[Blitzkrieg1701]

Granted, but you accomplish this by turning into a rodent and living in the restaurant's kitchen.

I wish I was a charming, witty, outgoing person who has deep, meaningful relationships with everyone I meet.

[USSRGirl]

Granted. But now everyone hates your guts out of insane jealousy for your perfection so you have no friends to share your outgoing nature with or establish meaningful relationships with.

I wish I was a rodent instead of Kal.

[Blitzkrieg1701]

Granted, but you take over the role as rodent just before the owners of the curry place set out mouse traps. Plus, upon being kicked out of the rodent form, Kal became a charming, witty, outgoing person who has deep, meaningful relationships with everyone.

I wish for four.