Corrupted wish game

[Tsukuyomi]

Granted, now everyone who plays it explodes into many many pieces o.o

I wish I learn my lesson the first time u_u

[Kaligraphic]

Granted. You've learned your lesson and won't try to run away again. Now, get back to work.

I wish that people wouldn't look down on me for making random girls from the Internet do chores for me.

[Blitzkrieg1701]

Granted. Now they look directly at you... and curse.

I wish I could get a full night's sleep in 45 minutes or less.

[Ratrace]

Granted, but you have to stay silent or outside so everyone else can sleep.

I wish laughter was really the best medicine.

[Kaligraphic]

Granted. Medical science is completely gone, and people are dying left and right of common ailments that they are told to simply "laugh off". You murderer.

I wish that cats would say witty things at clever moments.

[Blitzkrieg1701]

Granted. The cats are now so cleaver that people constantly feel inferior and depressed.

I wish I could make space and time turn into cheese.

[Ratrace]

Granted, but as you'll be cheese as well we all have to spend eternity as a dairy product.

I wish I could read 2000 words a minute.

[Ingemar]

Granted, but you can only read 2000 words in Sanskrit per minute.

I wish people would drink my beverages.

[Kaligraphic]

Granted, 50-year-old overweight truck drivers will "drink your beverages", if you know what I mean. And you know what I mean.

I wish that people didn't have to think about Ingemar's "beverages".

[Blitzkrieg1701]

Granted. They don't have to "think" because they KNOW. *jibblies*

I wish Strong Bad was my servant

[mitsuki lover]

Granted but unfortunately Strong Bad refers to his BO so you can't be in the same room with him.

I wish Sao Sakura would say hi!

[Kaligraphic]

Granted. Sao Sakura says hi - randomly, when she's by herself. Nobody ever finds out.

I wish that mitsuki lover would sing Gilbert and Sullivan songs.

[Blitzkrieg1701]

Granted, but it turns out that Gilbert and Sullivan actually wrote "99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall" and "The Song That Doesn't End"

I wish Terriermon could be bought at your local pet store

[mitsuki lover]

Granted but he's still annoying as ever and you have to buy Lopmon to go with him.

I wish that they would make an anime about Ichiro!

[Kaligraphic]

Granted, they make an anime about Ichiro Honda, a Tokyo janitor. It's really boring, and for some reason, Ichiro has enormous eyes.

I wish that I could get paid to watch baseball.

[Blitzkrieg1701]

Granted. You get paid to watch old crippled ladies play basketball... in Siberia.

I wish I had a solid gold pair of socks

[Kaligraphic]

Granted. You have a solid gold pair of socks, encased in a solid cement pair of shoes, and you are sinking into the marsh in a classic upscale mob dissappearance.

I wish that I had a butler.

[mitsuki lover]

granted you have a butler named Jeeves.The only thing is that he forces you to speak in a rather silly English accent and change your name to
Bertie Wooster before he'll do anything for you.

I wish they had diet coffee.

[Blitzkrieg1701]

Granted. It tastes awful, costs much more, is weirdly thick and gritty, and is made of ground up kittens and puppies... but they have it.

I wish I could turn chalk into gold with my mind

[Kaligraphic]

Granted. Unfortunately, if you try it, the gold will turn you into chalk with it's... goldness.

I wish that pizza didn't get cold so quickly.

[mitsuki lover]

Granted you now live in 12th century England,a time when pizza never even existed so your pizza will no longer get cold!

I wish that they had a giant Kirby Puckett bobblehead doll to replace the
bridge that went down in the Twin Cities.

[Blitzkrieg1701]

Granted, but it's a toll bobble head, so you have to pay 50 cents every time you look at it.

I wish all the everything in the was that didn't wasn't some nothing.

[mitsuki lover]

Granted everything that wasn't now exists and everything that was now doesn't exits including your question.

I wish that it would snow in Los Angeles.

[Blitzkrieg1701]

Granted. It's nuclear winter.

I wish The Red Hot Chili Peppers would take up underwater basket weaving.

[Kaligraphic]

Granted. Unfortunately, they are afflicted by typos, and take up underwear basket weaving instead. You've never received a browner, stinkier, slimier, more horrible and gutwrenching fruit basket in your entire life, and you pray to God that you never do again.

I wish that I had more burritos in my freezer, because I'm out right now.

[mathgrant]

Granted, you have a burrito in your freezer! That's more than nothing. But since you're out of the house right now, your annoying brother eats it before you get a chance.

I wish I had a plushie of a gold dragon.

[mathgrant]

Granted! You have a plushie of a foxger's. . . eye.

I wish Homestar Runner updated every day.

[mathgrant]

Granted! You drop out of all your favorite subjects. You don't have to read textbooks related to those anymore!

I wish I didn't have to eat food.

[mitsuki lover]

Granted you now own the Tobasco Lite Industry,but unfortunately you get sued by a gazillion people who happen to be dyslexic and think you own the Tobacco Lite Industry.

I wish that pro-wrestling was replaced by pro-beach volleyball on Sci Fi
Channel.

[Kaligraphic]

Granted, but it's all fat nudist dudes, and nobody wants to see that.

I wish that Ashley would make me a sandwich.