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"More"

PostPosted: Wed Sep 01, 2004 12:19 pm
by EireWolf
I don't think I've posted this here before... If I have, sorry for the repeat. I wrote this a few months ago. Please let me know what you think.



More



There must be more

Than air in, air out
More than eating bland food
Or even savoring delicacies
More than going to school or work
Every day, for knowledge or pay,
But going because I think,
What else is there to do?

I know there's more!

Know it in the core of me
That little spark of You
Flares into flame on dry days like this
In moments when I stop, and allow myself a beat of time
To feel the pulse of You within my veins.

You live! You live,

And I allow myself to wither and die
When I have the Living Water within reach.
You live, not even a breath away,
And I refuse to breathe. Rather,
I watch myself turn blue in the mirror,
Because You did something I didn't like,
And I'll play this little game to make You change.

And so I slowly lose consciousness and You stand,
Patient, ever patient with my childish striving,
And You step closer and revive me with Your Living Water.
Just enough to wake me,
Not enough to drown me.
And when I wake, I complain
That You didn't give me enough
And still, You suffer to hear my cries.

Ah, me! I am blind! I cry,
With my eyes squeezed firmly shut.
The Light shines brilliant all around
And sometimes peeks through my laboring lids
When I let my guard down.
More! I cry, More light!
As I reach for a blindfold.
I fumble to light the lamps I've made
And I am satisfied
With the comfort of just knowing they are on.

Ah, me... I am most blind indeed.
Take my eyes, that I may see!
And trust not my own devices,
These artificial lights I have contrived
To keep me comfortably blind.

I know that there is more
Than what these carnal eyes will let me see.
I feel You in me.
The quiet whisper just below consciousness
That my spirit longs to answer with a shout!
My flesh strives to drown it out
By mentioning all the things I have to do today.

You live.
You share Your Life.
You hold it out to me
Like a cup of cold water on a blistering day.

Do I accept?
Or do I continue striving and sweating
And spurn Your gift
Because I haven't got the time?

(Can't You see I'm busy dying?
[INDENT]You've got to offer more[/INDENT]
[INDENT][INDENT]Than just Your life.)
[/INDENT] [/INDENT]





(c) 2004

PostPosted: Wed Sep 01, 2004 12:26 pm
by ShiroiHikari
wow, lovely job. *claps* ^_^

PostPosted: Wed Sep 01, 2004 12:55 pm
by Staci
That's an excellent piece of work!

PostPosted: Wed Sep 01, 2004 3:20 pm
by Mithrandir
Well captured, きない!

PostPosted: Wed Sep 01, 2004 5:25 pm
by true_noir_chloe
This is fantastic, Eire! *hug* I think you've changed it since I read it last. Did you?
*joins Shiroi in clapping* ^___^

PostPosted: Wed Sep 01, 2004 5:39 pm
by Banana-chan
wow what a poem. That was soo....deep. that is what i admire in a poet. That is sooooooooooo awesome. :dance:

PostPosted: Wed Sep 01, 2004 10:59 pm
by EireWolf
:red: :) Thanks everyone.

I like your panda avatar, Banana-Chan. :grin:

TNC, I don't think I've changed anything since you read it. I might've changed the format a tiny bit, and italicized some things, but I think that's all.

I've got some "more" poems at www.flactem.com/wolf (click on the poems link), but I think "More" is the best among them.

PostPosted: Fri Sep 24, 2004 11:40 am
by shadowblade
Wow, really excellent piece. I think my favorite lines were:

I fumble to light the lamps I've made
And I am satisfied
With the comfort of just knowing they are on.
Ah, me... I am most blind indeed.

So much truth in that. Awesome job! :)

PostPosted: Fri Sep 24, 2004 12:32 pm
by EireWolf
Thanks, shadowblade! And welcome to CAA! :)