Oak:Hello, I am Professor Oak. You can tell because of my grey hair, snazzy labcoat, and massive pile of books that I am somehow carrying with one hand despite my old age.
Oak: I would like to welcome you to the magical world of Pokemon! What is a Pokemon? I think perhaps the better question is what isn't a Pokemon. I don't think I've seen any other type of wildlife in this world besides Pokemon.
Oak: Pokemon are used for many things in this world. Some people use them as models for their photographs. Others use them as test subjects for various hand cream products. I just like to study them and record useless things within these Pokedex. You, will just use them for legalized dog fights and laugh as they fight to the death. Back in my day, I remember when *Professor Oak goes off on a 15 minute tangent about how in his day they did kill Pokemon, they instead killed each other...with guns...but that's silly now isn't it*
Oak: Oh that reminds me...I have seem to forgotten your name? What was it again?
Peanut: Walking the path of heaven, the one who will rule them all! Peanut.
Oak: This is my grandson...um...oh curse my tendency to forget important information, what was his name again?
toonman: It's me gramps! Your favorite grandchild toonman!
Oak:...oh yeah...I suddenly know why I forgot that information. As you can see, my grandson is a jerk and has an incredibly offensive odor. *whispering to Peanut* This is why I only visit his sister.
Peanut: Makes sense...
Oak: Anyway, before you both run off into tall grass, let's get you some Pokemon. Peanut, you can choose first.
toonman: But gramps, I'm family!
Oak: Yes...I know...*under his breath* I told them to put him in an orphanage...grumble grumble...
*Peanut picks his first pokemon*
Meet Winry, the Charmander.
Winry: The voices in my head tell me to burn things.
toonman: If your going to pick a Charmander, then I'll grab a Squirtle, since they can absolutely own any Squirtle.
Peanut: Great, now I can get going and start...
toonman: Not so fast Peanut! I'm going to prove myself to my grandfather, by having my Pokemon beat the snot out of yours!!!
Peanut:...Buddy, I think I'm a little out of your league...
toonman: Go Squirtle! Attack him before he can walk through the door!
Squirtle: SQUIRTLEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!! *Squirtle charges at Peanut who moves to the side letting him crash into a random scientist, crippling him for life*
Peanut:...um...I think we should take this outside...
Oak: No, no, don't worry about him, it's not like my buisness has health care or anything of the likes. Please, continue battling in this place of science and expensive equipment that costs more then your combined college tuitions.
Peanut:...all right...
The battle was epic! One that would be told for the ages! Winry would scratch! Then Squirtle would tackle! Then Winry would scratch again! Then Squirtle would get up and tackle again! Yeah, ok, it was the lamest battle ever...however it did prove Peanut was right, he was way out of toonman's league.
Peanut: See you around toonman!
Winry: That was fun.
Peanut: By the way...you don't know any fire moves yet, so how did you light them on fire?
Winry: Oh, I know where Professor Oak keeps the gasoline and his lighter.
toonman: IT BURNS!!!!!!
Professor Oak: *to Peanut mostly* Don't forget a Pokedex!!! *Peanut suddenly has a Pokedex...thus making him do Professor Oak's job for him*
Peanut:...thanks I guess?